The Morning After
by manette
Summary: Mac and Harm finally get together- a silly spoof of the morning after


THE MORNING AFTER  
  
AUTHOR: manette-any feedback is appreciated to manetjt@aol.com  
  
RATED: PG-13- HARM IS NAKED (yes I'm shouting)  
  
SPOILERS: I mangled dialogue mainly from Measure of Men, Jagathon, Touch and Go, Capitol Crime and some others I'm sure I forgot  
  
DISCLAIMER: I don't own Jag but I just love all the characters to death even when I am having them act silly- so don't sue me, please  
  
SUMMARY: I tried for about 5 seconds to write a serious sequel to my Love and…series but everything I wrote was too dull or too NC-17 so finally when my brain exploded I just wrote this foolish bit of nonsense instead.  
  
  
  
THE MORNING AFTER  
  
Harm snuggled up to the brown haired, chocolate eyed, graceful limbed, ruby lipped, skinny waisted, ample bosomed, fleet of foot, quick witted creature in his arms.  
  
"Good Morning, Ninja Marine…" he murmured as he nuzzled her neck.  
  
Mac's eyes fluttered open and she smiled shyly. "Morning, Squid Stick."  
  
She couldn't believe that she was finally waking up in his bed after all these years. She just hoped things wouldn't be too awkward between them now that they had finally done the deed.  
  
"Last night was incredible, Jarhead Girl." He had a hesitant tone in his voice that concerned her. "But do you know why I woke you up?"  
  
"No," she answered uncertainly.  
  
"Cause I needed to ask you a question and I knew you wouldn't answer me if you were asleep."  
  
He had her attention now. "What is it, Hammer Boy?" Now that they were involved maybe he wished he were dead!  
  
"Was it good for you?" He asked, but he wouldn't meet her eyes.  
  
"Why? Wasn't it good for you? Are you having second thoughts about last night, Harm Fly?"  
  
He seemed surprised by her questions. "Are you testing me?"  
  
She jumped off the bed and wrapped the sheet around herself. "Just answer the question," she said irritably. She did a little jig as she waited for him to answer.  
  
"As long as you answer mine," he said defensively.  
  
By now she was crossing her legs and hopping from one foot to the other. "I'm so sick of  
  
this dance!" she cried as she ran to the bathroom. Nature called.  
  
Harm was busy gulping, and mulling his options, and swallowing hard, and weighing the facts so he didn't notice her mad dash out of the bedroom.  
  
Spring turned into summer and he finally decided that there was only one course of action to take. He had to tell her the truth, because the truth was everything.  
  
"It was," he uttered haltingly. "It was good for me."  
  
He looked up, eager to see the delight on Mac's face when she heard his words, only to discover that she was nowhere to be found.  
  
"Mac!" He jumped out of bed, desperate to find her. Not caring that he was naked, he raced into the living room and came to a screeching halt when he found Sturgis and a fully dressed Mac sitting at his bar eating Beltway Burgers.  
  
"Sturgis?? What are you doing here?" Harm grabbed some newspaper off the bar and tried to cover himself strategically.  
  
"Hey, buddy," Sturgis said before taking another bite of his hamburger.  
  
"I happened to notice Sturgis out the window stealing your corvette so he could take it for a little spin and I was having visions of Beltway Burgers so I convinced him to pick some up on his way back," Mac explained matter of factly.  
  
"You were having psychic visions about Beltway Burgers?" Harm asked incredulously.  
  
"Not exactly. I just saw vegetarian lasagna in my future if I didn't take corrective measures immediately." She smiled at him with greasy lips.  
  
"Hey, buddy, the Sports pages are slipping," Sturgis pointed out. "You might want to go put on some boxers or something."  
  
"Maybe I should, but I can't handle having a partner that knows the color of my underwear." Harm glanced shyly at Mac.  
  
Sturgis saw the looks the naked aviator and the feisty kick-ass colonel were exchanging. He might be the son of a preacher man but he wasn't a total innocent. "Are you two involved?" he demanded.  
  
"Yes," they both said in unison caving to the pressure of his question. He had refined his interrogating techniques to a fine art and they were no match for him.  
  
"Why don't you just get over it and move on?" Sturgis asked nonsensically.  
  
"It wouldn't work," Harm said as he sidled sideways over to Mac, trying to keep his newspaper in place and not moon Sturgis.  
  
Mac adjusted his classified ads and wrapped her arms around his waist. "We're in love with each other." They gazed into each other's eyes forgetting all about the questions they weren't going to answer until the other person answered first.  
  
"Harm, buddy, I hate to bring this up, but now that you are involved with Mac, do you wish you were dead?" Sturgis asked with concern.  
  
Newspaper flew everywhere as Harm exploded with agitation. Naked and visibly upset he yelled. "That is not what I said!" Biceps bulging he shook his fists and implored the heavens, "Why does everyone misquote me??"  
  
"Wish you were dead, feel like you're dead…What's the difference?" Sturgis didn't understand why his buddy was so upset.  
  
"Don't you see? It fundamentally alters the heroic nature of my character for me to utter such vile remarks about the love of my life!! On the other hand, if I merely feel like I'm dead then one can detect poignancy, a yearning, and a hope that my true love can save me from said fate." He was waxing poetic.  
  
The sight of her passionate, unclad, fiery, bare-bottomed, tempestuous stripped down sailor, with parts flailing, stirred Mac. He was magnificent in his fury. "Power down, Harm, at least until we're alone!" She whispered seductively.  
  
"Sorry, Mac, I get a little carried away when people mess with my noble make-up.  
  
Sturgis decided that he had caused enough trouble for one day and besides that he was really tired of seeing Harm naked. "Well. I better get going. Bobbie and I are supposed to sail out to some new island that was recently discovered. I can't think of the name of it but it was named for this man and woman who never did it even though they were single and physically attracted to each other. Can you imagine? It's become quite a tourist attraction."  
  
"Sounds like fun. Tell Bobbie we said hi," Harm said as he rewrapped himself in the Life and Arts section.  
  
"Bye, Sturgis. Thanks for the Beltway Burgers." Mac added happily.  
  
The front door closed and Harm and Mac were left gazing at each other longingly.  
  
"Alone at last," Harm murmured as he swept her into his embrace.  
  
"I thought he would never leave," Mac sighed as she wrapped her arms around his neck.  
  
"Where were we?" Harm asked as he scooped her up and carried her to the bedroom.  
  
"You were about to tell me if it was good for you and while I'm thinking about it why did you back away in Sydney Harbor?"  
  
The scene fades to black as our happy couple disappeared. Many questions remained…………….  
  
THE END 


End file.
